For the last two weeks I have been trying to convince Caleb to stay 10 for one more year! LOL My bubs turns 11 tomorrow and I see how much he is maturing and growing up and I don't want it to stop, but I would sure has hell like it to slow down a little bit!
At 11 years old Caleb has been through quite a bit and has still managed to be a well adjusted young man. He is so intelligent, and artistic and fun to be around. I love that he is still a kid! He doesn't try and act older than he is.
Last night we went out to a restaurant that has video games etc. There were tons of people, lots of kids etc. The kids really just ran around and played video games the entire time. When we were driving home I asked if he had fun. He said yes but some kids were getting on his nerves. I asked why.... his reply "this kid kept cussing.... like BAD words.... " Then went on to say how horrible it was and he was right around his age and he couldn't' believe this kid was talking like that.
I appreciate the fact that my son knows that language is not acceptable for a child. And that fact that he is disturbed by it makes me happy.
I have found myself really trying to make an impact on my boys. Showing them how they should treat women is a big thing of what I want to express to them. One day we walked down to 7-Eleven and got a treat.... as we were walking out, there was a young girl who was coming in, and Caleb was a gentleman and held the door, but then the other boys preceded to walk out.... When we were all outside I stopped them and said hey guys... I want to explain something to you. If you EVER come to a door and there is a girl, woman, young lady etc. trying to come in, always hold the door open and let them come in/out first. They reply but why.... I just replied because that is what men should do. And their response was OK!
We were listening to the radio the other day and that dumb song came on that talks about wanting to get married but the parents aid no, but I'm going to marry her anyway. The kids are signing along (I love it when they sing their hearts out in the car!) and I turned it down and told them plain and simple..... if you ever ask a girls parents to marry their daughter and they say no, don't you ever thing about marrying her anyway!!! If they say no there is a reason.... find out what the reason is!!
I am going to share a story of what I DO NOT want my kids to be... I have been doing this online dating thing for a bit now. It is really horrible. I am picky I know I am, and I was really trying to go outside my typical comfort zone when it came to the type of person I was willing to try and get to know.
So I had met this person online named Tony.... not my typical type (other than the fact that he had tattoos) He was a little older than I thought I would be interested. But after talking for a couple weeks, we decided to meet up in person and see how it would go from there. The simple version is we met in a public face, he talked to me for all of 20 seconds and said he wanted to move his car closer to mine, and he would be right back. And the trusting moron I am I sat there and waited for 20 minutes for him to come back. I left completely devastated and embarrassed. Did I look that bad? Ugh it was really a bad shot to my self esteem. And I sat back and replayed some of the conversations we had had, and one comment he made is that he had a 16 year old daughter and how he wants to be the kind of man that he would like is daughter to date. uhhhhh may want to rethink that one mister. I didn't give him the satisfaction of a call or text asking why.... And took some friends advice and chalked it up to he was probably an asshole anyway and he did me a favor.
I
try and influence the boys that women need to be respected and loved.
Teaching them to be happy, smart, confident, affectionate, not afraid of
feelings etc are all things that men "real" men should be able to
express. I don't want my boys to grow up and be closed off, "macho"
men who act like a-holes to women.... I want my boys to be the kind of
boys that a girls parent would be delighted to have my son date their
daughter.
Each of my boys have special qualities that make them unique, but raising them to have value as a young man is very important to me. Physical strength is important as a man, but being strong in mind and spirit is just as important. Teaching them that life isn't always fair, but to always strive for more. To know that their mom would do anything fort them.
